Chris McDuffie, CEO and Founder of Turning Point Addiction & Recovery Services (CA) joined Lon and
Chris McDuffie 844-437-7371 x10 www.myturningpointbegins.com
co-host Mary Romero on January 6, 2015 to explain the point that in order to best help their children, parents must first take care of themselves. Listen to this podcast as Chris explains to Lon and Mary some ideas as to how to do this and the importance of it.
In his seminars, McDuffie recommends parents read two books: Excellent Sheep by Bill Deresiewicz and Nurture Shock by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman. Chris then asks parents the following question; “Are you causing undue stress in your children’s lives?”
McDuffie encourages parents to hold up a mirror and ask themselves a few important questions. Is my parenting style working? Am I creating a happy and healthy kid? Am I doing this right?
“Communication is key when parents are talking to their children,” McDuffie explained. Perhaps it is even the “indirect” talking that your kids are hearing. We don’t know how they hear and handle our sarcasm, or yelling, or what they really might hear is that our main concern is school and grades. Maybe they don’t understand the back-handed compliments.
McDuffie challenges parents to examine where their parenting skills come from. Are the skills from old traditions, the way you were raised? Did these skills work for you when you were a child? Did you learn parenting skills? What skills did you learn? Who taught you? Were your parents good role models? McDuffie encourages parents to determine if the skills they learned are something they want to continue to pass on to their children; or maybe this is an opportunity to ‘stop the madness’?
McDuffie concedes that what we really want as parents is to raise and nurture our children. He offered some tips for doing so:
Ask questions, engage with them
Set goals and reasonable expectations
Use the resources that are out there when needed
Try to get them to be resolute and be ‘risk takers,’ that is let them learn to fail and recover
Have them learn for the sake of learning, rather than following a path or the norm